


Forget Me Nots for My Sweetheart

by ratchet_intellectual



Series: Remembering You Slowly [1]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Ana and Hanzo bonding over loving an idiot, Angst, Flirting, Jesse McCree is shameless, M/M, Or Is It?, Temporary Amnesia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 03:34:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14011281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratchet_intellectual/pseuds/ratchet_intellectual
Summary: After a mission gone wrong Hanzo is left to sit and wait as the love of his life goes under the knife. But the man he meets after the surgery surprises him.





	Forget Me Nots for My Sweetheart

**Author's Note:**

> Started writing this on the plane ride back from my vacation to the Overwatch League.

The room was still. The sterile white walls seemed blinding despite the faux natural lighting from above. The manufactured light were supposed to make the waiting room in the med bay feel warmer, as if the sun was sliding through the windows an a lovely morning but Hanzo has been staring at the walls for hours. The effect of the fake light had worn off and now the bleached white walls felt hot and sick. 

 

Genji sat to his left meditating, battle armor off to reveal the softer mix of synthetic and real skin. Two years ago the sight made Hanzo sick to his core but now he was able to appreciate his brother’s new form. He was still Genji, metal and wires included. His presence was comforting and helped anchor Hanzo to this reality instead of getting lost in the starch whiteness of the view ahead of them. They waited together for word. Anything. 

 

The surgery was going on now for ten hours but the archer could not bring himself to move. How could he when...No. He sat ridged the way his tutors had beaten into him as a child long ago. It was, ironically, the only thing keeping his anxiety at bay. Sitting still and focusing on his breathing, making the conscious decision to pull oxygen in and push out carbon dioxide. His mind focused on the flow to stop the thoughts that swam at the edges. Thoughts that screamed that this was all his fault. That said if he was faster, stronger,  _ better  _ this would not have happened. 

 

“Here. Drink.” Ana’s raspy voice pulled him back from the edge. His eyes crossed for a moment as he looked at something other than white walls for what felt like the first time in years. 

 

The older sniper had set two steaming cups of tea on the table in front of them. He didn’t argue, he knew from experience it was futile to rebuff an offer of tea from the elder, and picked up the cup and plate. 

 

“Thank you.” His voice sounded foreign to his own ears. She smiled, the wrinkles of her cheeks folding beautifully. She had the face of a woman who had a long, eventful life so far and a longer future ahead. It gave him some comfort that even with all her sacrifices and regrets, she was able to hold onto life with a formidable strength. 

 

Hanzo took a few sips. Genji made no move to reach for his; the meditative state he was in far too deep. Ana did not push it and instead sat down to Hanzo’s right. She folded her legs and sighed. The archer knew his was just as hard for her as it was for him, maybe even harder. Ana had nursed Jesse like a mother for many years after he joined Blackwatch at an age too young to go to war. She had taught him many things and he was family to her. 

 

“Thank you.” Hanzo said again simplify to fill the space with words.

 

“You’re welcome.” Ana turner to the older Shimada, her hawk like eyes roaming over the side of his face. “Have I ever told you the first time I ever gave Jesse chai?”

 

The corners of his lips twitched. 

 

“You have not. But I can only imagine.” 

 

Ana smiled, eyes going soft and misty. 

 

“Of course. You get know how he can be. He had just came back from a training session. Reyes was adamant that he went to the same classes as some of our upper level agents to get more professional work with reconnaissance and intelligence gathering. He’s a fast learner that boy. Took to it like a match to flame. He plays dumb, always had, but he has a thirst for knowledge. A surprisingly excellent student. And Jack couldn’t stand it! He hated Jesse when he first got here and tried to do everything to convince Reyes it was a bad idea.” She closes her  eyes as if to envision the scene. Ana brought a calloused hand up to cup her cheek dreamily. She was indulging in the memory more so than telling Hanzo a story. He could respect that and waited patiently for her to continue. 

 

“So you knew Jack was fuming when Jesse came back with top marks on his exams. Refused to give it so much as a once over. But I wanted to put on a little something to show we were supporting him. Reyes agreed so we got some cake and champagne. Nothing fancy but I did bring out this special blend of chai that I had been saving for something special. I had it for a while in after a mission in Izmir. A beautiful city. It was handcrafted, a recipe supposedly passed down for hundreds of years. It’s a shame. The bizar I bought it at is gone now. Long gone but I will never forget the taste. I brewed it at the table and put out a few cups for Jesse, Reyes, Farrah-she was barely a teenager then-and myself.  

 

Jesse was so happy. He never had anything like that before or at least, hadn’t had it in a long time. A celebration for his hard work. He was so excited that he grabbed the cup and drank it like a shot of whiskey.” Ana laughed, soft and beautiful and wistful. The sound was one of Jesse’s favorite so it made Hanzo smile knowing that the cowboy would have lived to hear it too. 

 

“And then he...he got this face. I can’t do it but Farrah can. I’ll never forget it. He was so disgusted. Spat out as much as he could manage. All over the table. Reyes was so mad. Said  _ boy you’ve lost what little sense you have! _ ” She chuckled. It was a far cry to imagine anything like the nightmarish ghoul scolding a young Jesse but Hanzo tried to picture Commander Reyes as he was, not as he currently is. 

 

“Then Jesse said  _ Boss! What in the sweet hell is that?! That ain’t no tea I ever had!  _ And he looked at me so betrayed like I was trying to kill him. Could you believe it? My ancient tea blend spat all over the table. I was not even mad. It was so endearing. The boy only ever had sweet tea from jugs from the convenience store. Most likely never even seen a tea bag much less a diffuser.”

 

Hanzo chuckled. Jesse still maintained that tea was nothing but rotten leaf water but Hanzo had caught him on many occasions late at night brewing a small pot of Ginseng. 

 

“I suppose I have you to thank for teaching him to appreciate life’s small gifts. I do not know what I would do if he could not brew a simple pot.” 

 

At that Ana looked up in surprise. Her eyes brightened then went sharp with a sly smile. She was keeping something from him and she knew that he knew that she was. 

 

“Well, when he wakes up you will need to ask him why he learned.” The mirth of the memory now underscored by the reality of the situation. 

 

Jesse might not wake up.

 

That thought alone sent a chill through Hanzo’s body and he stiffened up again; the cup of tea the only thing stopping his hands from seizing up. 

 

“Yes…” Hanzo replied shakily. He willed his body I bring in a breathe and push it back out. “When he wakes up.”

 

They sat in silence again but if Ana shifted infinitesimally closer towards him, he would never say. 

 

* * *

 

By the time Genji came out of his meditative state his tea had gone cold but he still drank it out of obligation. 

 

“ _ Have you been here this whole time brother? _ ” ‘He murmured in their native tongue. 

 

“ _ The same as you. _ ” Hanzo replied. He did doze off sometime in the past hour but it was a fitful sleep that lasted only minutes. 

 

“ _ Have you eaten? _ ”

 

“ _ Commander Amari brought tea.” _

 

“ _ That’s not food. _ ”  Ana said in Japanese as well. She was reading a paper bound book, a novelty in this age. 

 

“How can I…” Hanzo did not finish the sentence. 

 

Genji rested his mechanical hand on his shoulder. His eyes were sad but his jaw set. 

 

“He will be here when you come back. He would not want you-“

 

“Do not tell me what he would have wanted!” His voice was low but harsh and he instantly regretted it. Jesse meant a lot to everyone and Hanzo has no right to a monopoly on intense emotions about the situation. “I apologize.”

 

His outburst, like most of the ones he had since joining Overwatch, did not phrase his brother. Instead the cyborg smiled a scared smile that remind Hanzo of summers spent under the cherry blossoms.

 

“It’s okay. Get something to eat. Wash your face. It will take twenty minutes and ATHENA will let you know immediately if he wakes up.”

 

Hanzo looked to the sniper on his right and was met with a similar smile. 

 

“We will wait here. If he wakes up when you are gone, he will not be alone.”

 

“Okay.” Hanzo said but he made no motion to get up. Instead he looked at the doors to the emergency room where Mercy and Lucio were in there working diligently to save McCree. He was in good hands, arguably some of the best in the world. He could spare twenty minutes. 

 

After another eternity Hanzo got up. He heard his brother breathe a sigh of relief. His muscles wobbled after prolonged rest but he manages to shuffle out of the waiting room.

 

The walk to this a smaller pantry and kitchen was short but Hanzo felt as though he had ran a marathon. He grabbed some premade rice, a bowl, and a few slices of cured salmon. As he watched the bowl heat in the microwave, his mind obviously went to Jesse. 

 

He saw his smile, remembered the feel of his hands wrapped around his. The wash of his breathe against his clavicle as he slept like a rock after a mission. The surprising thickness of his hair between Hanzo’s fingers. The scrap of his teeth along Hanzo’s inner thighs. The timber of his laughter. The shear warmth he radiates as they laid against each other on the couch. 

 

The thought that all that might be gone, that he might never experience any of that again left Hanzo empty. Empty like the decade he spent in self imposed exile. The idea of going back to that, after experiencing what happiness could feel like, was horrifying. He couldn’t do it. Not again. He was so close but...it’s what he deserved. Who was he to ask for such happiness after all the blood that has stained his hands making them permanent like his ancestral dragon tattoos. 

 

The chime of the microwave went unheard as Hanzo was frozen in the kitchenette. Life without him...Life without him. 

 

**...Him.**

 

“What?” Hanzo instinctively looked up to the ceiling. ATHENA was calling him. 

 

**Agent Hanzo, I have been informed that Agent McCree is awake and you may see him.**

 

His feet carried him like the wind and Hanzo couldn’t remember ever running that fast, not even when his life was at stake. 

 

* * *

 

 

Hanzo rushes into the room as quietly as he could. He didn’t want to disturb the potentially delicate situation. 

 

His heart stopped. 

 

There he was. 

 

Laughing. Everyone seemed to be giggling with goofy smiles. 

 

Hanzo felt like the dam that had held everything in had broken and he almost cried. 

 

Almost. 

 

He caught himself before making himself a fool in front of everyone. The room wasn’t as somber as he assumed it would be and his frantic panic felt out of place among the humorous atmosphere. The sharp change left the archer reeling. 

 

McCree was sitting up right, back against his pillows. There was a fresh bandage around his head and his arm was in a sling but he was whole. He was talking wildly and smiling. He hadn’t noticed Hanzo come in.  

 

Genji and Ana were there at Jesse’s side while Dr. Ziegler was all but collapsed into her chair. The long surgery and recovery period had taken a toll on her and it showed. The room was filled with Lucio’s healing music and the DJ was leaning against the counter looking worse for wear but grinning with a zest only he could manage.  

 

Hanzo looked more than confused as he tried to assess what he could have possibly missed in the short interval of his departure. 

 

Finally, McCree followed the rest of the eyes in the room to Hanzo. He looked at the archer with wide eyes before whistling long and low. 

 

“Now who is this lil cutie?”

 

“What.” Not a question, just a…

 

“What.” Hanzo repeated. He was stumped. Their relationship was always an open secret that everyone was privy too but they both refrained from exuberant public displays of affection. 

 

Jesse didn’t stop, his eyes roaming over Hanzo as if they were in their bedroom. Lecherous is how to best describe it, not something to do in polite company. 

 

“Sweetheart why don’t you come over and let me hold on to you a bit. I’m a dying man.” Jesse said, holding out his hand to Hanzo, with a grin.

 

“Not dying. Not yet.” Angela said with a helpless sigh and tired smile. 

 

“Yeah, not dying. The good doctor fixed me right up but I got me another kinda ache that I’m sure only you can fix sweetness.” Jess winked. 

 

Honest to god winked. 

 

Hanzo frowned. “What’s wrong with him?”

 

Mercy sighed again, pushing her bangs out of her sweat slicked face. 

 

“Temporary amnesia. To remove the bullet we had to do a lot of work around his medial temporal lobe. It should come back within the next few days, a few weeks at most. The surgery was a success and we removed the bullet. What took so long was the healing the infection. That was the real struggle...but thanks to Lucio’s bio-audio technology we were able to keep his general vitals stabilize long enough for my caduceus staff to focus on repairing the wound. It was touch and go for a while but he will live.” 

 

Hanzo’s eyes went wide as he stared at the hand still outstretched to him. Jesse looked at him expectantly. 

 

“He shy? I like ‘em shy.” A heat raised high on Hanzo's cheeks. 

 

Genji couldn’t take it any longer. He busted out laughing at that. 

 

“Yes my brother is quite shy.” The tension that had plagued his body before was gone. He was relaxed and lackadaisical. 

 

Ana petted Jesse’s shoulder. She was relieved as well, her heart lighter. She had felt foolish for even doubting Jesse: he was too stubborn to die. 

 

“You better watch out dear, he’s taken.”

 

That didn’t seem to deter Jesse at all as he pounded his unbound arm on his chest. 

 

“I can take him.” He replied in his cocky drawl. Lucio smirked. 

 

“Well you better be careful, he has the quickest draw in the West!”

 

“Now yer pullin’ my chain. Bet he ain’t too tough. I'll put a bullet between his eyes before he could even draw his gun.” Jesse looked at Hanzo again. “Yer worth it sugar bean. I’ll fight a thousand men if that means I get a second of yer time.”

 

Hanzo wanted to disappear into the ground. Genji and Lucio started cooing and laughing at him. Even Angela let out an exasperated laugh at the cowboy’s antics. 

 

The archer scowled, angry at himself for even thinking Jesse would not be a complete handful at all times. If he wasn’t scaring the sniper with near death accidents, he was embarrassing him in front of their colleagues. 

 

“Oh baby, ain’t that a face.” Jesse whistled. He turned to Ana. “Is it weird that I’m into that? He mean muggin me somethin fierce but my lil ol heart can’t stop fluttering.”

 

“Yes, I would say that is very strange but to each their own.” Ana laughed. Her hand hadn’t left his shoulder because she was thanking Allah for keeping this terribly silly man on earth. Her training precluded her from being of any use in the ER as she dealt more with battlefield trauma and emergency care in the mid fight rather than hours long, intricate surgeries. She was glad to have this chance, to simply have a causal touch, with him. Far too long had she been removed from such small pleasures, the warmth of family and a world where hands didn’t just kill but could also love. 

 

“Well,” Jesse turned back to the still bitter faced archer “I reckon I must be a lil strange then. Don’t mind it darlin.”

 

“You dress as a cowboy during the day, I would say you are a bit more than a little strange.” Genji noted. His oldest friend was safe and scheduled to make a full recovery. It was a great comfort and his inner soul could finally rest with ease. 

 

“And I’ve been told you’re a cyborg ninja so I’m guessing this lil group of ours is all a bit strange. Except you of course, baby doll. Ain’t a strange thing about you.” 

 

Hanzo has not time to reply as the door busted open. 

 

“FRIEND!” Reinhardt lead the charge into the hospital room as the six agents away on another mission in Russia were finally back. 

 

“I’ll be damned; ain’t you a huge sonovabitch?” Jesse laughed and the room descended into a joyous chaos. With the whirl of commotion Hanzo slipped out of the room unnoticed. Well, partially. He felt a familiar pair of whiskey eyes on him as he closed the door. 

 

* * *

After a few hours resting and eating, Hanzo returned to the medbay. Everyone had left after seeing Jesse was whole and healthy. His memory was still scattered but he had recalled certain interactions and people. Names and faces of people long dead. Sounds from Hana’s video games. Scenes from the movie they watched last week. In the status update Mercy had disseminated to their coms McCree was making great  progress and was on track to recover everything by next week. 

 

“ATHENA,” Hanzo called as he stood outside of McCree’s door. “Is Agent McCree awake?”

 

**Yes Agent Hanzo. Would you like access to the room?**

 

“If you could.”

 

The door opened up soundlessly to reveal Jesse reclining in his bed. Lucio’s healing tunes played softly in the background acting as an environmental anaesthesia for the pain. The room was dimmed, windows drawn, as he read off his holopad. The cowboy looked up to see him and smiled. 

 

“Why hello there sweetness.”

 

“Hello McCree.” Hanzo walked to his bedside. He studied the face of a man he could look at for eternity. His New Mexico tanned skin, the lines of his eyes, the scar that split his lip, now time faded. The bandages smothered his hair and Hanzo noticed the edges of a buzz cut. He wanted to touch and run his fingers through the trimmed locks but he refrained from moving. 

 

As much as Hanzo was staring at him, Jesse gazed right back with a dopey grin. 

 

“I gotta say I missed you something fierce when ya left. Couldn’t stop askin about ya.”

 

“Did you now…” Hanzo gripped the bed railing. His voice was low as to keep from waking the elephant in the room. 

 

“Yup. Everyone thought is was so funny. The lil miss in the pink- Hanner? She thought  it was real cute.”

 

“Hana thinks rapid dogs are ‘real cute’ so I would hesitate to trust her judgement there.” Hanzo replied, making Jesse chuckle. Oh how he missed that sound...

 

“Is that right? Well I guess I needa take her word with a grain of salt.” Jesse peered up at him, his face eased. 

 

“Are you in any pain? Can I get anything for you?”

 

“No I reckon this here music got me feeling fine. All I need is for that pretty face to keep lookin at me like I’m the only man in the world.”

 

Hanzo blushes at the comment, free to show his embarrassment away from prying eyes. Jesse smirked at the reaction. 

 

“McCree.” Hanzo said in warning but there was no heat behind the words. The corners of his mouth twitched, threatening to break into a grin. 

 

“Please honey, I insist, call me Jesse. The good doctor said that calling my name out may knock some memories loose.”

 

“Jesse.” Hanzo murmured. The gunslinger lit up like the Fourth of July. 

 

“Now all I gotta do is figure out how I can get you to scream it.”

 

Hanzo shoved at his shoulder, gently measuring back his strength, in admonishment. 

 

“Behave.”

 

“Darling you don’t make it easy for me. Whoever yer man is, he’s luckier than a four leaf clover in the hat of a jackrabbit to have ya.”

 

The archer couldn’t help but laugh at the asinine metaphor. 

 

“Why would the rabbit be wearing a hat?” This felt familiar and safe. The air between them felt like home and Hanzo was eager to relish in what he had not lost. 

 

“Cuz it’s lucky.” Jesse laughed. “I like your scowl plenty but that laugh? Could make angels weep with jealousy.” Jesse reached out his hand to grab at his. Their fingers slipped together perfectly. Hanzo leaned in closer. 

 

“Do you always flirt so much with taken men?”

 

“Reckon I can't remember but I got a feelin you don’t mind much. He don’t treat you right?” There was a swell of protectiveness in the question. Hanzo simply brought up their hands to kiss Jesse’s knuckles. 

 

“No. He treats me far better than I deserve.”

 

“Can’t imagine anyone like you deservin less than the stars and the moon itself.” Jesse watched his actions carefully. 

 

“You don’t remember but…” Hanzo felt brave enough to finally reach out and cup Jesse’s cheek. He caresses the growing stubble along the curve of his face. “We are together.”

 

“Well I’ll be damned.” Jesse muttered. His eyes were wide and mouth slightly agape. “How a dumb ol cowboy like me manage to get a blessing like you?” 

 

“I am no blessing.” Hanzo replied simply. His heart felt full to burst as Jesse turned his head to kiss at the hand on his cheek. 

 

“Anyone with eyes can see to the contrary angel face. Reckon I must’ve made a hell of a deal with some devil for yer heart.” 

 

“No deals.” Hanzo trailed his fingers lightly against the bandage before going down to trace the outline of his nose and lips. The light in Jesse’s eyes were wicked. Hanzo leaned in to kiss where his fingers had been. First, along the ridge his nose, then along the cut of his cheekbones before finally pressing against the gunslinger’s lips. 

 

“Must’ve been.” Jesse insisted as they parted.“Think you can do that again for me sunshine? I’m a dying man. 

 

“Not dying.” Hanzo corrected as he leaned in again. He knew he couldn’t go any further than chaste kisses but the promise of what’s to come when Jesse was discharged was enough to keep him going. 

 

“Not dying,” Jesse echoed. “But if you keep this up I just might. I forgot to ask beautiful, what’s your name?”

 

“Hanzo.”

 

“Hanzo? Alright Hanzo. There’s no way I’m ever forgetting that again.” 

**Author's Note:**

> You will pry these commas from my cold dead hands. Please kudos/comment, it gives me the validation I so desperately crave.


End file.
